Bend tech to my will,
They think I’m a genius.
I just Google stuff.

Two minds intertwine,
Code flows as one hand guides hands,
Ideas take flight.

Tests run while we sleep,
Errors caught before they grow,
Code safe, calm, and strong.

Plans change every week,
Sprints end with no code to ship,
"Agile" sounds so false.

We gather to talk,
Blame circles, coffee runs dry,
Next sprint more of the same.

Lines twist, bugs hide deep,
Cursor blinks, patience runs thin,
"Why do I do this?"

Daily standups drone,
No blockers, no goals are set,
Just coffee and talk.

Loops twist, branches merge,
Unraveling feels futile,
Lost in tangled strings.

Forgot to branch off,
Now the fucker doesn’t work.
Wish I could revert

A missing comma,
That took me two days to find.
I hate this language.